Guest Blog Tania Fowler - metaphors
A Metaphor is Like a Catalyst
Posted on November 26, 2012
Ask for a metaphor. If you’re the kind of person people tell their troubles to then the next time someone starts sharing a problem with you simply ask them what the best metaphor is. You won’t even believe what they come up with and how clear it makes the whole thing. Oh, and the questions you can ask from knowing that! Invaluable. Metaphors are great for helping people see what they are mixed up in by taking a problem they are close to and giving it some distance. They can look at it from this more objective vantage point and begin to make some sense of it.
Here are some from various leaders: ‘I’m painting a little corner of the painting without seeing the rest of the canvas.” “It’s like the crazies have taken over the castle and I need to get the keys back.” “I’m on a dirt road and the dirt is turning into quicksand.” And here is one of my favorites: a family asked me to come in and do some temperament and interaction style training with them based on Myers Briggs. They had 2 daughters and one had recently graduated from college. She was sort of hanging out not doing much about finding a job. It came up in our session and so in front of her parents (a great family, BTW) I asked her what the metaphor was for what she was feeling. She was in a small rowboat out at sea, she said, and she was just drifting there waiting, she guessed, for someone to come help her. She even had the paddles in the boat but didn’t think about using them and, unbelievably, she could see the shore! She was, upon further self-reflection, waiting to be rescued. We talked about that and not more than three weeks later, that same young woman had gone out and found not one, but two jobs! That was years ago and now she has a very nice career going for herself. Fear of the unknown had her paralyzed but the metaphor worked as a catalyst to help her see her predicament and move her on.
Metaphors are like a fantastic tool for getting people unstuck; like getting your feet out of the quicksand and onto firm ground
Posted on November 26, 2012
Ask for a metaphor. If you’re the kind of person people tell their troubles to then the next time someone starts sharing a problem with you simply ask them what the best metaphor is. You won’t even believe what they come up with and how clear it makes the whole thing. Oh, and the questions you can ask from knowing that! Invaluable. Metaphors are great for helping people see what they are mixed up in by taking a problem they are close to and giving it some distance. They can look at it from this more objective vantage point and begin to make some sense of it.
Here are some from various leaders: ‘I’m painting a little corner of the painting without seeing the rest of the canvas.” “It’s like the crazies have taken over the castle and I need to get the keys back.” “I’m on a dirt road and the dirt is turning into quicksand.” And here is one of my favorites: a family asked me to come in and do some temperament and interaction style training with them based on Myers Briggs. They had 2 daughters and one had recently graduated from college. She was sort of hanging out not doing much about finding a job. It came up in our session and so in front of her parents (a great family, BTW) I asked her what the metaphor was for what she was feeling. She was in a small rowboat out at sea, she said, and she was just drifting there waiting, she guessed, for someone to come help her. She even had the paddles in the boat but didn’t think about using them and, unbelievably, she could see the shore! She was, upon further self-reflection, waiting to be rescued. We talked about that and not more than three weeks later, that same young woman had gone out and found not one, but two jobs! That was years ago and now she has a very nice career going for herself. Fear of the unknown had her paralyzed but the metaphor worked as a catalyst to help her see her predicament and move her on.
Metaphors are like a fantastic tool for getting people unstuck; like getting your feet out of the quicksand and onto firm ground
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